You’re in your head. You reach out to a friend in the hope that by speaking aloud you’ll find your way from your head back to your heart, back to the quiet wisdom beneath the cacophony. But the moment you start explaining whatever it is that is making your head spin, they interrupt you. Worse, they start giving you advice. You didn’t want advice, you wanted someone to listen, so you could listen to the deeper layers of your self.
I can’t tell you how many times I felt frustrated about this, even with very good friends. I know I do it too: try to help those I love by sharing my thoughts and solutions, while perhaps all they wanted was a ear.
I’ve been studying the work of Parker Palmer and the Center for Courage and Renewal in the past years, which is all about creating circles of trust where we can come together to listen, to not give advice, not fix, not correct each other; to connect more intimately with our inner teachers.
And I want to practice with you. With those of you who feel moved to practice with me. I’ve done plenty of therapy, and I don’t think it’s what I need right now. I need to continue to nurture my connection to my intuition, to practice discernment and deep listening, among others on a similar path.
On the 4th June, I hosted the first Deep Listening Circle of Wiser Now, in the company of my dear friends Guy James and Sophiia Dehé. We spent an hour and half sitting with the question of ‘what work is ours to do, what isn’t’.
Less than half way through the session, I noticed a shift in the quality of our presence, the moment we allowed silence to speak.
Conclusion: every fourth day of each month, I’ll be hosting a Deep Listening Circle, from 6 to 7pm WEST. I’m in conversation with people who are interested in joining to decide on next themes and questions to sit with. Sometimes we’ll have dialogues. Other times, one of us will be on the hot seat. Let’s see what this space wants to become.
If all this sounds like something you want to be part of and co-shape, you can join this calendar to stay up to date. I’ll also send reminders and announce the themes a few days before each circle.
Sessions will be offered as a gift. If you feel like you want to reciprocate via a financial contribution at some point, there will be ways to give back, but that won’t be the condition for your presence.
With love,
Carlota
P.S. I’m currently editing an interview with writer and Courage & Renewal facilitator Brian Braganza, with whom I conversed about the Courage & Renewal approach among many others things like writing, new masculinities and belonging.
I’m a slow editor, as you might have noticed — I’m clearly process oriented. That said, the episode should be out in July. Before that, I’ll post an interview with Andreas, founder of Alma Ohana, a land-based project and former intentional community based in the Alentejo, Portugal.
No advice and being present..and listening? You feel like my kind of people 💞